Thursday, August 27, 2015

Crumbling walls

What do you do? When the walls that you've built up around you begin to crumble? Do you rebuild them? Do you stop and wonder why they are there? Why did you build these walls? Were they for 'protection'? Did you feel safer knowing that these  walls were there? What purpose do these walls serve? And maybe the most important question is do you still feel like those walls belong?

I'd like to say that I don't have walls built up, but I do.. I think everyone does.At one time or another you felt hurt and scared and built the walls because you really had no idea what else to do. Over time the walls started to become part of your foundation. Part of 'who you are'... I'm only saying this because I know its true for me.

I don't know exactly why those walls are still up, and honestly I don't know what happened to make me build them. The hurt and pain have moved on, or I've found my new normal and so it doesn't hurt so much that I feel I need protection. But what is interesting is when someone bumps up against this wall you feel it, like really deep down, in your heart of hearts FEEL that they've hit this barrier. You can't let them any closer, they can't penetrate the wall! (even if you want them to)

Self protection is an interesting concept.

 I'd like to hope, think, pray that the walls that we've all built will one day fall apart. That we don't feel we have to protect ourselves from others. In a world where there is no intentional hurt and the word sorry is commonly said and that it actually means something.

Challenge: Allow your walls to crumble a little. Test it out. See if the tiny cracks that are formed hurt or if they allow you to feel something you haven't felt in a long time, maybe that feeling is good. If you have to, rebuild, reinforce and put up big shiney lights so others won't bump into your walls, but hopefully you'll find that some of these cracks are okay to have.
My walls have cracks that I don't think I'm going to fix... perfect walls don't mean anything if you can't feel anything.

H

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